Frustration = Motivation?

Let me start off by apologizing to any skinny person that may have read my post from yesterday and was offended. I wasn't trying to be ugly. I know we all have self image issues whether or not we are skinny or lubby. Skinny people seem to have it so easy. Eat what you want and not worry about it. If you gain a pound or two, no big deal.  Lubolicious people have to think about everything we eat...whether it be good or bad.  No one stares at a skinny person if they scarf down a quarter pounder with cheese, but hand it over to a person of lubbyness and everyone stares and thinks "How gross, they should be eating a salad!".  That's all I was saying......people don't scrutinize what a skinny person eats. For people who are of the hefty nature, everything we eat is scrutinized.  Anyhooooo.........

I have recently gotten back on the treadmill along with eating rabbit food healthier meals.

 Last night after we came home from my son's game, I was a little frustrated for various reasons. It was later than I would have liked, but I got my butt on that treadmill to run out some of my frustration and it helped a lot.  I warmed up for 5 min (about .25mi) and then just started running. Set my pace and kept trucking on.  When I looked down I had run to 1.25 miles which means that I ran a full mile without stopping. I was so excited! I walked for a little bit and then ran a little bit more until I reached 2 miles.  By this point it was probably 10:00p so I decided to stop. It sure did feel good! I woke up today and before I had eaten anything (except a banana), wanted to get on the treadmill to run some more. Wait, WHAT??  Did I just say what I think I just said?  ;)  

Again, I warmed up for 5 min, set my pace and started running.  This morning I ran to 1.50 miles, which means I actually ran 1.25 miles without stopping. YA HOO!!  Kept my mind focused on a few things and before I knew it, I was there.  Seems like it went by so fast. For the last .25 miles (to 2 miles) I put the treadmill on an incline of 6 and worked it!  I could feel the burning in my legs and it actually was a good burn.

It's kind of amazing when you focus on something in particular instead of just randomly thinking while exercising.  Will have to do that more often!

Question: Does it matter what time of day you walk/run?  Is there a better time as far as burning the most calories? Or is it all personal preference?

Hope you guys are having a wonderful day! Mine has been good so far! :)

Skinny Girl Is a'Screamin'

That's what I said.  The skinny girl in me is fighting so hard to come out.

 I am constantly surrounded by skinny people.  The ballpark, the store, fast food places, the mall and even David's Bridal.  Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of meaty people at those places too, but I only seem to notice the skinny ones.  It's almost irritating.  Whenever I see or are around skinny people, it just reminds me of what I am not.  Being around overweight people isn't so bad because there will always be someone who is more hefty than me so in turn that makes me feel a little bit better about myself because I can say "thank goodness I am not as big as that person."  I know, that's not nice to say but it's the truth.  Who doesn't think that way too? If you don't than you are lying.

Something else that I find irritating......which I shouldn't , but do is when I hear skinny people gripe and complain that they need to lose weight. Seriously???  Ooooohhhh so you had one too many fiber one bars or an extra cookie. Big deal!  You'll probably burn that off just walking back to your chair or as in a fiber one bar.......flatulate those extra calories out. LOL! If you don't know what I'm talking about, grab you a few of those yummy bars and you'll know exactly what I mean. Anyway,  I understand that skinny people want to stay skinny and I guess if they feel a little off by an extra pound or two, then that makes them physically feel bad or "fat", but try having an extra 80lbs on you and trying to walk away from that extra cookie.  It's very hard to do.  One more won't hurt right???  Especially if you are addicted to sweets. *Ahem*....not saying I am or anything........

Ok, enough with my complaining about skinny people.  They really have it so easy and just don't know it. 

I am happy to report that I am back on the wagon. In total, I have gained back about 5 of the 15 I lost.  I absolutely hate how I worked so hard to get those off and in turn gained them back sooo quickly. DARN YOU FOOD!  If I didn't have to have it to survive, I might just skip it altogether.  BUT,  I have already lost a few of those pounds that I gained back. I have really been watching what I eat and have been on the treadmill.  I am determined.  To be totally  honest, this roller coaster ride is no fun.  I hate scrutinizing what I put in my mouth (even though I have indulged in a small Baby Ruth or cookie from time to time) every time I eat, but that is what is essential for me to do.  I must do this and do it literally minute by minute.

 I sort of feel like a smoker in the sense that they are used to the habit of holding a cigarette up to their mouth and participating in the act of smoking. For me, it's the constant need to have something in my mouth. It's hard to explain but just like when you open a can of  DDP or whatever carbonated drink you like and you take that first initial sip and the burn hits your mouth. I love that! Or the crunchiness of a few RF Pringles crunching in your mouth.  That's what I crave.   I keep gum on hand just for that reason.  For the feeling of needing something in my mouth all the time.  I know I have issues. ;)

I had my daughter take a picture of myself the other day in my workout clothes.  Wow.  I was so disgusted.  See, I really don't see myself the way I must look to others. I blame the mirror in my bathroom. When I look at myself in that mirror, I see someone who needs to lose weight but it's not an extreme amount. But when I see myself in a department store mirror, I really am shocked  because I think those mirrors really do show you how you look. I don't know if it's the lighting or something about the mirror, but I always get depressed when trying on clothes at a store because then, I am hit with the reality of  how overweight I really am.  I see the scale and know it too, but my eyes don't see what you all see. 

Well, I'm back to trying to get the skinny girl out.  We will see. It will be a day by day process, but I am going to really try again. 

If you are still reading this blog and haven't given up on me totally, please say a prayer for me.  I would really, really, really appreciate it.  Thank you.

Loves!!